flowers and candy

i had this idea when i was 13teen. i would find a love and we kiss under the apple tree, its flowers looking down on us. I would the kind of love that would make you cry. We would lay in bed and never want to get out.

I didnt get that kind of love.

I have not been kissed unders a flower tree, or layed in bed for days.

I dont know what i found, but i did cry.

one day ill live my dream, and ill let go of some of this hate.

I hate you for what you did, and i hate him.

I was sad and had my dreams of love and you fucked that up! Now i know the truth and i understand that love, gay love can never be sweet not with poop on your dick.

I hope that some one takes your dreams away, puts them into a bag and runs away in the night. I want you to under stand what it is that i lost.

I was 19teen and fucked up and would cut names into my arm, did you know that? Did you know that I tryed to kill my self? Did you know that i would take rocks and hit myself with them. I could have died, i was the one who made up my mind to get better. i was the one who stopped cutting my self. That was me.

Im going to be the one that will have to kiss myself under that fucking tree.